I would have waited to boast about how great the (almost) past 365 days have been with my fabulous husband, but we'll be away from the internet as we cruise on down to Mexico to celebrate!
Lately, Corey and I have been asked for advice from those who haven't found their forever yet. We have had a lot of opportunities to solidify our answers.
For those of you who are still out there looking--maybe waiting--for your companion, your expectations should be no more than:
1) Your spouse will put one-hundred percent into your relationship just the same as you will.
and 2) Your spouse will love you endlessly.
Corey and I have found that having unnecessary expectations for one another will just cause more disagreements than a husband and wife care to worry about. I'll be honest and say that when we got married, I expected him to take out the garbage without me asking, and I also expected him to know exactly what to do and say when I'm upset. On the other hand, Corey expected me to do the dishes every night, and to clean all the time. This caused a lot of stress that neither of us needed.
This past year, we've learned that we should set all other expectations aside, and just love. When you love an individual, you feel a greater inclination to serve them.
Corey and I don't assign each other chores. We've decided to treat each other as equals. It makes things much better between us. I've taken out the garbage a handful of times just as Corey has cooked dinner quite a bit. Essentially, if we see something that needs to be done, instead of wasting away on unreasonable arguments, we pick up a broom, a spatula, or a sponge and we get the job done.
The key ingredient to a loving home is to politely ask, not silently expect. Communication is vital if you want your relationship to flourish--and that doesn't mean constant bickering over whose turn it is to clean the toilet.
I think you could say we've had a successful first year together. I can see the growth in both of us as individuals and as a partnership.
Anyone who knows me knows that I suffer from a bad case of stubbornness. I have to be right--not all the time, but most. Corey has taught me patience through his example. He has never raised his voice at me, and he was always the first to apologize when we I was fighting. While I still get irritated (who doesn't?!) with my spouse, it comes easier to me to just stop, breathe, and make it right.
Likewise, when I married Corey, he wasn't entirely focused on excelling in school. As long he got a passing grade, he was fine. As we went through school fall semester, I could see him focusing more and more on what grade he received and the quality of his work. It was so rewarding to see him light up at his grades when they were posted. They were well-deserved.
Who knew that spending hours on end with the same person every day for a year would yield so many opportunities for personal betterment?
Nearly one year down and eternity to go!
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