Holding on to What I Know

As previously mentioned on my Facebook page, a new policy in the Church has been issued regarding the children of same-sex parents. I, however, am not here to shed light on the subject. My purpose for this post is to spread love and thoughts to ponder.

I have not always been one to openly accept every single doctrine of the church, every policy. I remember getting indirect warnings for wearing my pajamas to seminary, not understanding the reason behind not watching R-rated movies--but watching them anyways because I thought it was fine--and being sat down for uncomfortable lectures from my parents about kissing boys when I was fourteen. I've definitely had my fair share of questions beginning with "Why...?"

Some things, some principles, some policies simply do not make any sense! I always seem to feel it is my job as an individual to make sense of the matter; I need to know why the commandment or policy is what it is and why we have it set in place. Sadly, I've come to understand that it simply does not work this way.

Who sees the bigger picture? Who knows best? God. It is always God--not me. Although I have my own portfolio of opinions, sometimes I need to lay them aside so I can say with pure conviction: "I know Jesus is the Christ. I know Joseph Smith was a prophet. I know the prophet and apostles on Earth today are called of God and act in His name. I have prayed and I know."

Feelings are a choice. Overcoming confusion is a choice. Do not sit idly by while the "author of confusion" implements his best tactic on the children of God to draw them further and further away from the straight and narrow.

Initially, I was a little taken aback by the newly issued policy. As I thought more about the reasoning behind it, I came up with some conclusions, but I, honestly, do not know what the true, possible purpose is other than this: God loves His children and wants to do His best to protect them.

'Protect them from what?' you might ask. I think--I do not know, but I think God wants to protect His children from making covenants they will find harder to keep than any other individual as they reside in a household where they would be torn between the gospel and their parent's relationship.

I do not know God's direct thoughts, but I can learn of His truths through one tool: the Spirit. The Spirit enlightens the mind rather than unraveling a spool of uncertainty.

Let me reiterate my thoughts: 

Feelings are a choice. Overcoming confusion is a choice--light can be found if you will seek it out.

Please. Please. If you are fighting your conscience against this policy that will, in turn, cause your testimony to falter, fall to your knees and plead with the Father to give you understanding. He wants you to understand. He wants me to understand. He wants all people to understand that this is not out of hatred, but out of His undying love for all of us.

As hard as it is to accept that this policy could quite possibly be in direct association with the will of God, do not lean solely on your opinion or the opinions of others; do not let your testimony sit on your negative outlook on one policy. Do not allow the adversary to shake your testimony. I know, I know, Satan is using this policy as a way to draw as many as he can away from the truth. It is the adversary's plan to recruit individuals to, first, deviate from the path of righteousness themselves, and then assist others. Please do not trust the enemy.

Allowing feelings to trump truth always seems to be the easiest route to take. In times like these, when the mist of darkness impairs our vision, reach out to the iron rod; reach out to the Savior. So long as you grab hold and continue to grasp onto Him, relying on His perfect and infinite sacrifice, you will be comforted.

Many don't consider the Atonement to be a way to ease the burden of confusion, but remember that Christ has felt all the afflictions of the world: is confusion not an affliction? Confusion troubles the soul. Christ will ease that burden if you turn to Him, if you lean on Him. 

Please hold on to what you already know. As for what you do not understand and find inconceivably difficult to comprehend, "Therefore, ask and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you; for he that asketh, receiveth; and unto him that knocketh, it shall be opened." (3 Nephi 27:29)

I beg you to take your questions to God: not to the media, not to incorrect doctrinal sources. 

Moroni's promise is not only applicable to reading The Book of Mormon, but to any question about the truth of a piece of doctrine. "And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things." (Moroni 10:4-5)

In spite of confusion that constantly arises in my life, I refuse to let it rip away the very light that holds my life together. I refuse to let the darkness overtake my happiness. I absolutely refuse to let Satan lead me to think something is wrong without consulting my Heavenly Father first. I refuse to let go of what I hold dear. My testimony will never be shaken due to doubt.

In the words of a dear apostle, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf says it best:

"Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters--my dear friends--please, first doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith. We must never allow doubt to hold us prisoner and keep us from the divine love, peace, and gifts that come through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ."

My friends, I know this gospel has been restored through the prophet Joseph Smith. I know that Jesus is the Christ and that He lives. I am sure of it. I feel it in every fiber of my being that this is the gospel of the firstborn of the Father. Nothing will change the light the Spirit has shed on me that a fourteen year old boy saw God and Jesus Christ. Likewise, nothing will cause me to withhold my sustaining of the prophet and apostles because I know they are divinely appointed servants.

Do not. 

Please.

Do NOT allow doubt and confusion hold your testimony captive.

I love you. God loves you. Never forget it.